A friend and I were talking the other day about why it’s sometimes so difficult for us to write, even though both of us have grand and glorious dreams of supporting ourselves someday through writing, and both of us are very creative in other areas.
We both admitted to sometimes being terrified when it comes time to put something down on a blank page. Why?
It’s not hard for me to sing in front of an audience, and I never have a blank when I sit down with a bunch of beads and some wire. Neither of these things frighten me because if someone were to tell me that my voice sounds like a crow hitting a plate glass window, or that my jewelry looks like it was designed and crafted by a one-handed monkey, I could shrug it off. It has nothing to do with who I am, merely what I do in my spare time.
But when I write, my words are a reflection of who I am. I’m not thin-skinned; I can take criticism regarding craft, word choice, characterization, plot, what have you.
But if I were told, “You shouldn’t write. You’re just no good at it,” I think something inside me would shrivel up and die.
And somewhere inside my head, there’s a voice that tells me I shouldn’t write. That I’m just no good at it. And the voice is loudest when the page is blank.
I get a little sick to my stomach, a little dizzy, and my palms get sweaty.
The trick, I guess, is to muscle through the fear. To know that it’s okay if my first draft sucks. Because it’s not me; it’s my first draft, and it’s not written in stone.
Some good blogs and articles that might help if you have this problem, too:
Making Creativity Click at Fear of Writing
Creative Writing and Fear at Clarity Works
Battling Yourself: Fighting the Fear of Writing at Brazen Careerist
Enjoy!